Family and Friends responses to loss

What you can say:

  • I am sorry
  • I love you
  • I’m sad for you
  • I’m thinking of you
  • I’m here for you
  • Take all the time you need
  • I don’t know what to say, but I care about you so much
  • The baby’s name, if the baby was named
  • I’m here and I want to listen

What NOT to say:

  • Everything happens for a reason
  • You can always have another baby
  • Be thankful it happened now, before you got to know the baby
  • There must have been something wrong with the baby
  • You’ll feel better as soon as you’re pregnant again
  • Your baby is in a better place now
  • Now you have an angel in heaven
  • You need to be strong
  • I know just how you feel

How can you help:

  • Listen
  • Touch
  • Cry with the family
  • Attend the funeral/memorial service
  • Remember than on their baby’s due date, birthday, and death day anniversaries
  • Never forget…

Remembrances you can give the family:

  • Planter/ flowers in a vase or a plant/tree/ rosebush as a living memorial
  • Original or special poem
  • Donation to a memorial fund
  • Needlework
  • Keepsakes


Just remember that it is never too late for expressing your feelings to a family about the loss of their baby.